never have i felt so smothered / i am sweltering in a blistering fervor
this fervor is nothing but full of malice, i am blown up out of
proportion and undressed in the most
wrong ways.
always, always. is what i tell myself
always keep your cool
stay soft, stay soothing, stay calm
in your enveloping distress, don’t let it
eat you up.
today i am waking up again, my automaton arms whirring sweetly
at the 3:30am alarm, i am sitting by myself in a thick solitude. the
air rests heavy on my heart as i am awake, unnerving so, my blood
was pumping in my ears last night.
oh, how does one escape the chains of routine?
always, always, i lay my head down to rest at 5am,
but i never sleep because it is soon to be dawn.
i lay in my muted blankets and fall into a tired stillness and wake up
for the second time at 8am.
today, just like yesterday, i crank back the bolts in my shoulders
rest my fingers on the metal and pound keys like
it’s a daytime job, run my fingers on heated silver till
run the mice till the sky darkens again, 5pm.
By Dion Kim
Dion is a Korean-American multimedia creative who goes by a plethora of names. She's also a double shot latte addict and enjoys sleeping at random hours of the day.